Dr Thrawn, Arts Therapist
by hillstar
Summary: What if, instead of trying to use his art-interpretation skills to conquer the universe, Thrawn had decided to become a therapist? Can he help the Star Wars characters through the power of ART? Humor/Parody.
1. Chapter 1

With concerns growing about the spread of the Dark Side, a new healer had been brought in to assist the regular healers at the Jedi Temple. This healer was a young blue-skinned Chiss, an arts therapist named Dr Thrawn.

Dr. Thrawn had the reputation for being able to analyze anyone just by looking at his or her artwork. His process was to offer sheets of paper, pencils, and paints, to allow his patients to make whatever designs they wanted, and then to give advice based on what they had created. It was an unusual process, but one that was known for its uncanny accuracy.

The first Jedi he examined was Qui Gon. While Thrawn watched, Qui Gon played around with the various art supplies on the table. After several minutes, Qui Gon showed Dr. Thrawn his picture, a large sheet of paper containing cartoon bunnies, cats, puppies, and flowers.

As Dr. Thrawn took notes on his notepad as he offered his interpretation.

"Hmm… These designs and squiggles indicate a warm, energetic personally…and the bright colors show an admirable zest for life. Yet, from the way you left this corner only partially shaded in, and from the perfunctory manner of your sketches, I can tell you have a habit of getting carried away and not completing what you start…"

"Really? You can tell all that?" Qui Gon asked skeptically.

"Yes, and the bright, pastel colors suggests also unwillingness to recognize the shadier aspects of life."

"That seems like a lot to tell about someone from a piece of art."

Dr. Thrawn studied Qui Gon with his red eyes narrowed as he answered in a hoarse voice. "Art… is the window to the soul…"

* * *

><p>Dr Thrawn looked over Obi-Wan's creation. Obi-Wan had painted a sequence of brown squares, each neatly lined up in a row.<p>

"Hm…" said Dr. Thrawn, "Is there some reason why all of these squares are brown?

"Brown is a perfectly nice color," said Obi-Wan.

"But it is not the most expressive. Though, I can tell from the intensity of the brush strokes and the fine attention to detail, that sensitivity lies underneath the placid surface. However, was it really necessary to color everything inside of the lines?"

"The lines are there for a reason!" objected Obi-Wan, "If it weren't for the lines, it would all be too unpredictable! This way, everything is unified, and it all makes a nice, solid pattern…"

Dr. Thrawn looked at the picture again, letting a sympathetic tone slip into his voice.

"Hm… I think if you crossed some of the lines, you could still make it into a pattern eventually …maybe what you need is to let go and trust the creative process…"

Sitting straightly on the coach, Obi-Wan nodded.

* * *

><p>Padmé Naberrie painted a picture for Dr. Thrawn to analyze, wondering weather his interpretive abilities were as good as people said they were. Her sister Sola had recommended Dr. Thrawn to Padmé after Padmé's latest breakup.<p>

Padmé painted in a variety of flowing colors, the texture of her brush strokes resembling the curves of an ocean.

"Hm… these swirling lines suggest a conflict between order and turmoil. Perhaps this is why you've been having relationship troubles, because of an attraction to danger."

Padmé' frowned in objection. "The only men who approach me are volatile ones, like Rush Clovis. I think it's because of my position as Senator. Other types of men are too intimidated by my success in my career."

"I think that kind of man that _is_ your type, Padme," said Dr. Thrawn, "I can see by the jolting, contrasting colors here that you are secretly enticed by chaos, much as the Republic flirts with its own destruction."

"The Republic does not flirt with its destruction! We are tirelessly committed to upholding order and peace."

"Then why was electric blue such a fashionable color in the Senate this season? I believe it is because you politicians are bored with stability and subconsciously desire a 'jolt' of excitement!"

"Fine, so what if I'm bored…I'm a woman, not a machine! I need love just like anybody else!"

"I didn't say you can't have excitement in your life. Just be cautious before you embark on an affair with a dashing Jedi knight…"

Padmé' blushed. "What makes you think I would do something like that!"

"It is obvious from the sensuous, art nouveau style dress you are wearing, that you are drawn to the role of the forbidden lover."

Padmé' averted her eyes, her blush increasing. _Damn, the blue-skinned therapist could see right through her!_

* * *

><p>Anakin Skywalker was sulking in the coach across from Dr. Thrawn. Obi-Wan had sent him to the alien healer to try to work through his myriad issues.<p>

Anakin reluctantly showed his piece of a artwork: a mess of thick squiggly lines and several black and red splashes of paint that he had splattered onto the paper without exactly looking at what he was doing.

"Hm…very interesting…" said Dr. Thrawn, "Your style is very Avant-Garde, yet primitive…"

"Are you going to tell me that I have anger problems? Because everyone already says that."

"I think that your real problem is that you resent people in authority but feel you lack the agency to actively rebel."

"What makes you say that?_" _

"Because you just drew a doodle of me with a silly-looking moustache and then erased it when you thought I wasn't looking."

"I did not!" cried Anakin.

"But perhaps there are better ways to channel these energies? Perhaps you can use artistic outlets to vent your frustration, rather than violence?"

"_Yes Dr. Thrawn…"_ Anakin said, his head lowered, flickers of spite darting in the recesses of his eyes.

* * *

><p>Dr. Thrawn studied the Senator's inner chambers.<p>

"Interesting… your decorative choices convey mystery and authority. However, from your limited color palette and favoring of industrial lines, I can tell that your weakness is your overestimation of your ability to control your environment and your underestimation of the power of the individual spirit…"

Palpatine looked down at Thrawn from his throne-like chair. "I didn't send you here for a personal analysis. I just wanted your advice on what kind of propaganda poster you think would win over the citizens of the Republic."

Dr. Thrawn took a moment to ponder this question.

"Hm…I'd say something featuring Jedi heroes and partial nudity, but tastefully done. The people of the Republic are unaware of their true motivations and still fancy themselves as somewhat classy."

One finger to his lips, he added thoughtfully, "Also, lots of sparkles. Sparkles will always grab peoples' attention."

"That is true…"

"But perhaps you would be better served channeling your controlling impulses into art. Have you ever tried puppetry?"

"Hm…well, I've always wanted to make my own puppets," admitted Palpatine.

"It can be very relaxing for people your age to craft with felt and yarn…" suggested Dr. Thrawn.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: A big thanks to everyone who reviewed. Your reviews inspired this follow-up. **

Obi-Wan noticed that Anakin had been acting strangely ever since Anakin had started seeing Dr. Thrawn. Anakin's behavior seemed more restless than usual, though less sulky and resentful.

"How have your visits been going with Dr. Thrawn?" asked Obi-Wan.

"Actually, that's something I've been meaning to talk to you about. At first I didn't really like Dr. Thrawn, but after a few sessions he kind of made me start to think."

Anakin fidgeted, shifting the weight between his feet. "All my life I've been taught to obey authority and not to go against the grain. But when I thought about it, I realized, I don't really want to be a Jedi…"

"You don't?"

"No…" said Anakin, "I want to be an artist!"

"An _artist_?"

"Yeah! Jedi aren't supposed to show their feelings, but artists are encouraged to express all of their deepest emotions! In fact, being really sensitive just makes your art more artistic! And Jedi aren't supposed to have attachments, but an artist is to supposed to look to a muse for inspiration!"

"Are you serious about this, Anakin? Qui Gon made me promise I would train you as a Jedi."

"But didn't he also talk a lot about going with the flow and living in the moment instead of being stuck on the past? I think he might be over that vow by now if he knew you would let me follow my dreams."

"Well, Dr. Thrawn _has _been encouraging me to loosen up a bit. But what about being the Chosen One and bringing balance to the Force?"

Anakin grinned and struck a confident pose. "I will bring balance...with my radical new style!"

* * *

><p>Around that time, a striking new spaceship began to appear in the skies of Coruscant, "The Creation Star," a psychedelic vessel displaying splashes of color across its hull. Inside "The Creation Star," Anakin worked tirelessly on his paintings, sculptures, and assorted "pieces" as he travelled the galaxy, searching for inspiration on far-off worlds.<p>

The charismatic artist gained an instant following for his "bold, passionate designs," and for "fearlessly throwing off convention." As his acclaim grew, his paintings were purchased at high prices in auctions across the galaxy, especially those paintings capturing the celestial beauty of his mysterious "angel.'" Rumors claimed the mysterious muse was none other than the seemingly prim-and-proper Senator Amidala. Those rumors were proven true when she took a leave of absence from her work so that they could travel together like a pair of space gypsies. They citizens of the Republic were such fans of this passionate, scandalous couple that Padme Amidala won every subsequent election against "that boring, outdated old Palpatine."

Skywalker's greatest triumph combined his fresh eye for color with his technical know-how. Commissioned by Lando Calrissian, "The Rainbow Squadron" was a fleet of ships colored every shade of the rainbow. This massive work enabled Anakin to spend his later years on Naboo, working on smaller pieces while training his children in the craft.

It was believed that Anakin's son, Luke, would follow in his footsteps and emulate his style. His daughter, Leia, on the other hand, showed an inclination towards rebelling against her father by becoming a Jedi.

* * *

><p>Many years later, Dr. Thrawn made his final visit to the Jedi Temple.<p>

"Worked out for the best, it has," said Yoda. "Thanks to you, prevented my visions of a dark future were."

"I should be thanking you," said Dr. Thrawn, "for paying that scholarship so I could get my psychology degree instead of going into the military like I'd originally planned."

"Yes...all arranged according to my visions it was."

"Indeed. I can tell from the tiny felt puppet you've been crafting, that you, like Palpatine, prefer to work behind the scenes, pulling the strings from afar."

"Not a puppet, that is!" said Yoda, "Me as baby, supposed to be it is."


End file.
